Mist & Fog 6

I packed light since I had no idea where we were going. I chose a green halter top and a pair of jeans. Broderick had brought clothes over to change at my place and was wearing jeans and a black shirt that reminded me where those arms had been. We were in his car, a black BMW, which was driving smooth. I was sitting in the passenger seat as he drove one hand on my thigh. We were making our way out of Minneapolis and heading toward St. Paul where he took the exit toward Rochester. My phone buzzed and I took it out of my purse to find my mother’s name on the screen. I sighed as I stared at it. I thought about letting it go to voicemail, but knew I would have to deal with her later on.

            “Hi Mom,” I said.

            “Where have you been? I’ve been calling your house phone all morning long.”

            My mother, Sheila, was a stern woman when it came to answering phones. I was sort of glad I didn’t inherit that from her. She was a beautiful, tall, slender woman for her age and had a massive head of brown curls. She wore only brand designer labels and her husband, my stepfather, Stuart, was able to afford her those things. He had a few businesses of his own and was now currently residing in New York. She lived in a huge penthouse with a closet of shoes and a showroom of jewelries. She didn’t have any of that with my father and she had been longing for it all her life. Now she finally had it, only my father’s heart was broke. I wasn’t sure if I would ever forgive her for it. We were talking, but it didn’t mean everything was good between us. It would never be the same again.

            “I’m sorry, Mother, I’m taking a short trip out of the city,” I said.

            “Where to?”

            “Just out for the weekend. What did you want?”

            She sighed. “Natasha, don’t change the subject on me. It’s rude. Where are you going?”

            “Where am I going?” I asked, but if she knew, it was more of me asking Broderick. He pointed to a pamphlet I didn’t see before tucked in the passenger seat. I pulled it out and saw it was a resort in Rochester.

            “I’m heading to Rochester for the weekend. Just a little getaway to refresh my mind.”

            She sighed. “If you needed a little refreshing, why didn’t you say so? I could have had you come out here for the weekend.”

            I sighed and cleared my throat. “Well, if it makes you happy, I have to come out to New York next week for some work. I’ll call you when I arrive and see if I can fit in lunch with you.”

            I could hear happiness in her voice when she replied. “That sounds wonderful! I have so much to tell you, Natasha. Stuart and I can’t wait to see you.”

            “Yes, me too, Mother.”

            “Well, I just wanted to hear your voice, sweetheart. I’m back from my honeymoon.”

            “How was it?” I asked, even though I already knew the answer.

            She moaned as if in disbelief. “Oh, darling, it was absolutely beautiful! Stuart had everything planned down to perfection and all I had to do was ring a bell and I got whatever I wanted.”

            I’ll bet, I wanted to say. “How nice.”

            “It was. I’m telling you, Natasha, he read my mind. It was the most beautiful honeymoon ever.”

            I felt my heart tear at the thought of how she never spoke like that about my father. I swallowed down the hurt and felt as if I was betraying my father by listening to her. I pushed the tears away and tried to remain calm. “How nice, Mother. Listen, I have to get going. I’ll call you once I’m in New York, ok?”

            “Alright, darling, I look forward to seeing you.”

            “Bye.”

            When I hung up, the conversation bit at my heart and the feeling of happiness I had moments before her call disappeared and I felt as if I was walking on glass. I knew that Broderick knew it too because his hand had left my thigh and was now driving with a stern look on his face. We passed the highway in silence and I thought about the hardship my father had taken into his life when my mother decided someone else was better.

            When I returned home to visit from college, I knew instantly things were different. You know that feeling where you feel like you were a third wheel? It was like that through dinner at the house the night I returned home to visit. My mother wasn’t wearing her wedding ring and although I knew that my father slept on the ground that night, they both had retreated to the same room for my sake. The blow of the affair came as a shock to me, but my father had suspected for a while because he knew her like the back of his hand. She’d stopped responding to his touch and when he spoke, she ignored him. My father spent a long time cooped up in the house refusing to speak to anyone, even me. For a long time, I was afraid he’d take his own life. But slowly, he started hanging out with friends again and rejoined the human race, even if he won’t open up his heart again.

            When we stopped at a gas station, I turned around to face Broderick, who wasn’t anywhere near going out to pump more gas into the car. He reached over and touched my cheek; his eyes were soft and dreamy as he gazed into mine.

            “Are you ok? Should we head back home?” Broderick asked gently.

            I shook my head. “No. Let’s go.”

            “I’m not going until you tell me you’re going to smile and be honest about it. I know your relationship with your mother is on a tight line.”

            I sighed deeply and ran a hand through my hair. “I’m fine, Broderick. If anything, please take me away from this. I need to get away. Please.”

            He leaned toward me and gave me a kiss on the lips. “Ok, if it’s what you want.”

            “You’re all I want, Broderick.”

            A slow grin spread across his face. “You’re getting the hang of this game, sweetheart.”

 

            We arrived at the resort a little after one in the afternoon. The lodge was beautiful, made of fresh wood and filled with simple furniture that made me feel as if I never wanted to leave. There were huge windows that let in light and it was fully stocked of food for the weekend. There was only one room and it was all we needed. A large sheepskin rug lay in front of the fire and already thoughts of us making love there entered my mind. After I unpacked, I walked out to the deck and took in the view. The backyard led to a small pond where ducks were swimming and quacking. I inhaled the fresh air and felt as if being here erased every single wrong thing in my life. I felt at ease and when he slipped his arms around me, it was the perfect touch to being freed from stress. He kissed my ear and I leaned into him.

            “Thanks for bringing me here. This was just wanted I needed,” I whispered.

            “Anything for you, sweetheart. If I could, I’d keep you here forever.”

            I smiled. “That’s a good thought. Perhaps we won’t leave.”

            “I like that idea.”