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Showing posts from 2019

Back to School

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2019 school has begun. This year, I have a 5th grader, 3rd grader, and a fresh new Kindergartner. This time of year reminds me of my childhood. It always makes me emotional because my parents could not drive like other parents. And when I was growing up, my mother walked me to school on some days. I remember she would be sitting across the school with her black umbrella waiting for me to come out. When she sent me to school in the mornings, she'd stand across the street and watch me enter the building and then walk home alone. My father had a wooden leg put in from an injury to war, so it was mainly my mother who walked us to and from school. I always looked forward to seeing her standing there waiting for me to come out. It gave me hope that I wasn't alone. When I got married, and I came to my wedding, a few of my relatives said that they missed her presence waiting for me at the school grounds. It made me cry. This year marks the 3rd year that my mother has passed and t

2019's Loss

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It's August...only and this year, my family has had a downfall with deaths. It seems like the book of life is closing early on me because since the beginning of the year, I've been slammed with death in the family. I seem to be losing more family members than I want and just as I think I'm strong again, a wave of loss hits stronger than before.  As a child, you always assume that your parents, any loved ones for that matter, will never stray from you. You will always have each other and no matter what, you'll never grow old. Sickness will never enter your life and happiness is all you will know. I remember growing up never having anything to worry but the thought of what am I going to do the next day to find enjoyment. As an adult, we learn that things happen without cause and we must learn to pick up our feet and move on. We must learn to heal from life's disaster and figure out a way to find hope in the darkest of times. That is the adult life we are never pr

Nco Ntsoov Kuv

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Nco ntsoov kuv...thaum kuv hluas, kuv yeej zoo nkauj tshaj koj thiaj li nyiam kuv. Koj thiaj li tuaj ua ciaj tuag kom tau kuv. Lub sij hawm kuv cov me plaub haus tseem dub, tseem ci, tseem zoo, lub sij hawm kuv lub me ntsej muag tseem tshiab, tseem mos, tseem hluas, koj tuaj cog lus tias yuav hlub kuv ib leeg. Koj lub siab yuav pom kuv ib leeg ua koj tug. Lub sij hawm thaum kuv hluas, kuv yog tus koj ntshaw tshaj.  Nco ntsoov kuv...thaum kuv tseem ua tau, kuv yeej tsis los thov koj ua ib zaug. Yog kuv ob sab tes, ob sab taws ua tau, ces lub ncauj yeej tsis tuaj thov txog koj. Vim tib neeg lub cev txawj laus, txawj mob, zog txawg tag, kuv thiaj tuaj thov txog koj hnub no. Kuv tus kheej los kuv yeej tsis xav tias muaj hnub kuv yuav zoo li no, es nrhiav qhov twg los zog tsis muaj.  Nco ntsoov kuv...thaum kuv tseem hais lus rau koj vim kuv tseem hlub koj. Yog hnub twg kuv lub ncauj tsis muaj lus hais rau koj, hnub ntawm yog hnub uas koj yuav tau txhawj tias yog vim li cas. Hnub nta

Lub Neej Sib Faib Tus Txiv

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Lub hnub tawj tuaj siab siab lawm, ua cas kuv tsim los, kuv pw ib leeg ntsiag to. Lub chaw tsis muaj nws pw ntawm kuv ib sab. Lub vaj lub tsev tsis sov, nyob yam txhias to kho siab lwj siab dhi. Vim tias nag hmo yog niam yau hmo es kuv thiaj li tau pw ib leeg nrog lub suab cua. Kuv paub tias thaum nws rov los, nws yuav nqa niam yau tus txhiab nrog nws los, yuav los tsw thoob kuv lub tsev, zoo yam ib tug xyw uas tsis pub nws dim. Thaum no, kuv yuav mob siab los kuv yuav ua txuj tsis paub mob. Vim lub neej sib faib tus txiv yeej zoo li no. Ntuj teb tag hmo thaum kuv pw ua npua suav phem, ntshai tsim dheev los kua muag tws si, los kuv yuav nrhiav tsis tau nws. Vim kuv tus dab ntub txawj phem txawj tsim kuv thaum kuv nyob ib leeg. Tej me kev npau suav phem los thawj kuv thaum kuv tus txiv tsis nrog kuv nyob. Ua rau kuv pw tsis tau, quaj sawv los ncig tsev txog tsheej tag hmo los tsis paub  ua zaj twg. Vim lub neej faib tus txiv yeej zoo li no.  Thaum nws los pw ntawm kuv ib sab, zoo

Ultimate Summer Concert featuring Spencer Quan Jai FanPheng

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It started with a message from my good friend Sheng Yang of NSY Entertainment. She messaged me about a few months back saying, "Honey, I'm putting together a concert for the July 4th festival gettogether. Will you help me make it happen? Will you be my emcee?" I agreed even though I was a bit nervous because I have no experience whatsoever being an emcee hahaha. But she's my friend and I agreed to help her out. We began messaging each other back and forth about who can help do what and the connections we each had. I was excited to help her make it happen.  She explained about it being a new wave concert, 80's music, going back in time. I thought, perfect! I'm  an old soul at heart and I love the music I grew up with. You can't find that anywhere these days. So I just couldn't wait until the day came. She put together a message thread and it included all the artists who would be performing and to better prepare myself, I looked up

Finding My Purpose

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An awakening has happened and I'm walking on a journey that has my mind, body and soul at one with something of a higher power. I have come to believe in something as great as my ancestors and I have come to experience something just as grand. My life up until now has been a vision of what is to be and although there were moments that I had to pause and really question things, the veil that has blinded my eyes has been lifted. I can now finally see clearly and without a doubt, I know that I have been born for this purpose.  The higher power calls to me and I answer on a daily basis. We speak as one, we travel as one and we live as one. It is within me and I can feel it grow stronger. I can feel it guide me as I walk through this journey to self-discovery. I am not alone. I have something that is of great purpose and a vision that is to heal leading me. With it by my side, I am no longer lost; I'm no longer afraid. I can face the day without fear and I can see clearly what